Meeting 1:1 With Your Manager

Maintaining an effective and efficient agenda is important to get the best out of the 1-1 meetings you have with your team members. Furthermore, this page will take you through other tips and tricks to conduct an effective 1-1 meeting.

The 1-1 Agenda

Make sure you use a consistent agenda format from meeting to meeting
Both parties add items to the agenda. Preferably, the majority added by the team member. If the manager puts more than half of the items on the agenda this is an indication that something is wrong.

Conducting a 1-1

From  High Output Management  (edited sightly for language):
“A key point about a one-on-one: it should be regarded as the reports’ meeting, with its agenda and tone set by them … issues that preoccupy and nag the individual contributor.”
How often you should have 1-1 meetings: "The answer is the job- or task-relevant maturity of each of your individual contributors. In other words, how much experience does a given report have with the specific task at hand?…the most effective management style instance varies from very close to very loose supervision as a report’s task maturity increases."
Bill Campbell, executive coach to top executives at Google, had a  suggested approach to the 1-1 . Instead of leaving the conversation open, he required both the manager and the team member to bring a list of 5 things to discuss. At the start of the meeting, they would match lists and talk about whatever is on both lists first. After that, they would spend time on 4 topics – performance on job requirements, relationships with peer teams, leadership and innovation.
If you have negative or positive feedback give it right away rather than waiting for the 1-1. However, make sure bi-directional feedback is given at least as often as the 1-1 meeting. The face to face 1-1 is also useful for feedback that the person may be especially sensitive too, or is being given for the second time and needs to be taken more seriously.
It’s important not to push times of the 1-1’s for “more important” tasks. Book them and ensure you always are on time. Similarly, canceling a 1-1 should be a last resort. The exception to this is recruiting interviews. If participating in an interview schedule, reschedule the 1:1 with as much advance notice as possible, but prioritize the interview.
One communication style does not fit all. Some need very direct feedback. Others work better with FYI style information to then come to the conclusion you want them to come to on their own. Others work well with clear goals, but without a clear prescription as to how to reach the goal. Great managers can adapt their style to the report.
It is common to start with a bit of small talk. You can also consider starting with asking how are you as a person?
The end of the meeting is a good time to ask questions people might be hesitant to answer.  People will often reveal their important information at the end of a conversation.  Use this to get information about things that are bothering them about other people in the company, including you as a manager. Ask a question like 'How can I make your life better?' or 'How’s the team and the work with other people?'. Don't put this question on the agenda in advance. Since it is the end of the meeting it might be needed to add it to the agenda to discuss in the next meeting.
Setting and managing expectations is maybe your most important task. Both the managers expectations of the work done by the report and the reports expectations about the work and company.
Reports tend to assume that they must do everything added by the manager, make it clear that they can push back (not a good idea, not worth the time), and redirect (please handle it directly with this person, can you arrange for this). You want to prevent the agenda piling up. The manager will put items on the agenda because it is in the functional area of the report and the manager doesn't want to bypass them. But in case the manager cares about something and the report doesn't it might be preferable for the manager (or an executive assistant) to do the work.
If you have few items on the agenda from the report try the following questions:
Is there anything that needs clarity?
What are you most proud of/excited about?
What can I (your manager) improve on?
Anything you think important that happened since the last 1-1
What are potential troubles you see for the team
What are potential troubles you see for the company
What went well last week?
What went not so well last week?
Is there anything I can do to help?
Anything non-work related worth mentioning?
When x happened, what will you do differently next time?
Have you identified any career development opportunities that I can help you with?
Other great questions to consider can be found in the  Culture Amp Blog: 24 great one-on-one meeting questions  or in 15Five's  The Great eBook of Employee Questions .


Career Development Discussion at the 1-1

As a manager of people, you play a crucial part in developing careers for your reports. This is for them but you should be able to support this process and help them achieve their goals. This is a join collaboration so prior to the meeting think about what questions to ask, specifically identifying competencies(c), skill gaps(sg), and career objectives (co). Adrienne Smith who wrote  increase employee retention with career pathing  suggests the following:

Which projects are you most proud of that you’ve finished here? (c)
What is your favorite part of your job? (c)
Which projects have you struggled with most in this role? (sg)
What’s your least favorite part of your day-to-day? (sg)
When do you ask for help most often? (sg)
What parts of your role do you want to do more of? Less of? (co)
What don’t you do in your current role that you’d like to? (co)
What would you like to learn next? (co)


Giving Feedback to your Manager

All of us want the same thing - to enjoy what we do. If there is something that is creating anxiety or stress, we'd like to hear about it.

Before giving feedback to your manager in a 1:1 setting, please prepare your thoughts by writing out detailed notes on the problem and potential solutions that may alleviate the issues you are experiencing.

It allows you to structure your thoughts
It ensures your thoughts are heard in exactly the way that you intend and reduces miscommunications
It enables your manager to come prepared with clarifying questions, ask their colleagues for information, and seek additional context
It keeps the conversation structured across potentially multiple problems / solutions

1:1s should be conducted in English

English is our organizations common language and communicating 1:1 agendas, recaps, and notes should be written in English.

Our organization has team members in more than 10 countries and holds over twenty 1:1 meetings each week. To ensure all voices are heard, the organization must manage this in writing, in a language shared by all stakeholders.

1:1 recaps written in another language besides English prevents your manager from effectively communicating the conversation internally within the organization.

Prevents your manager from forwarding the written communication internally to anyone who doesn't share your common language
Requires your manager schedule a meeting to discuss the contents of the conversation
Creates surface area for your manager to miscommunicate or mistranslate during internal discussions with other managers that don't share your common language

Key Points

Actively Listen. Self-assessment is difficult and people often overestimate or underestimate their skillset. Don’t be quick to discount their assessment. Look for common ground and focus on understanding their overall goals.
Control. Maintain control of the conversation to ensure it stays on track. The focus should be on their current skillset and abilities and how to cultivate those for a career path within the company.
Adaptation. Adapting your approach to different personality types is key. People that overestimate their skillsets should be given specifics on where they do, and don’t, meet expectations. They may need areas of failing to be pointed out more plainly (but always caringly). Those that underestimate their skillset may need more emphasis on what they are doing right as they tend to focus on the negative. Also, not everyone wants to advance. Some are very happy in the role they are in and want to stay there. That should also be supported.